Disclaimer: This information is purely based on my experiences of my first period after our 4 pregnancy losses.
After I posted my post telling you all we sadly lost our last baby to an ectopic pregnancy a lovely lady reached out to me for a chat. She had gone through the same thing 2 weeks before us and our babies were around the same age when they gained their wings. After chatting with her and answering the questions she had (it was her first loss) I realized how little information is out there for women who are going through this. I can remember how scared and clueless I was with our first loss. I had so many questions about what was about to happen and what I should expect in the coming weeks after being told the worst news on the face on the earth. I had no one to ask, the hospital didn’t give me much information on what was going to happen next and I didn’t know anyone in my life who had gone through the same thing so I went to good old google and YouTube and I couldn’t find much. So that’s the reason behind this post and a few more coming in the future. I want to hopefully help someone going through the worst, scariest time of their life by giving them an idea of what they should expect in the weeks after losing their sweet baby.
First of all, I’m so sorry for your loss. There are no words that anyone can say to make the pain go away but know that I’m here if you want/need a chat just message me I’ll leave my social media links below. It’s okay to cry, shut down, not want to leave the house, talk to anyone or even eat but it does get easier. No you will never forget and a part of you will always hurt but daily life gets easier I promise.
If you have been following our TTC journey you will know we have gone through 4 pregnancy losses now, 3 miscarriages and 1 ectopic pregnancy. This means I have experienced 4 first period after a loss of pregnancy so I feel like I have a good idea of what to expect. I have found my cycle returns around 2 weeks after I stop bleeding from the miscarriage and around 4 weeks from the date of my surgery to remove my tube and baby. However, just because my cycle returns around this time, it can take your body up to 6 weeks after but if it doesn’t return after 6 weeks I would check in with your doctor to check everything is okay.
So this is my must-have list of things to like to have ready and on hand for when my first cycle hits.
Thick, heavy flow sanitary towels.
I always find my first period is super heavy and clotty so my normal pads don’t cut it, they leak. I am a tampon user so I also find the bigger towels help me fell a little cleaner. They also help me deal with all the clots. As much as I have using pads, you have to use them instead of tampons as tampons run a big risk of infection with your first period after a pregnancy loss.
These are a huge must-have for me because of how much pain I am in. I find my first period is always so painful, I suffer from painful cramping in the first few days of my period but the whole of my first cycle is so painful for me. I’m not sure why it is so painful for me but I don’t know anyone else who has gone through a loss to ask if this is a normal thing that happens. So you may be lucky enough to have a first cycle that isn’t that painful. My first cycle after my ectopic pregnancy was the worst one I’ve had by far. I’ve become very in tune with my body from our TTC journey over the last 2 and a half years. So I know my body tried to ovulate from my right side where they removed my tube with the baby. I’m not sure if that’s why it was so painful but all I know is no amount of pain killers were helping with the pain, it hurt to move or even breath for the first 3 days before pain killers started to help.
Heat mat or hot water bottle.
Daddy bear brought me this heat mat a few years ago to help when my back hurts or I have period cramps. However, it has proven to come in handy when dealing with the cramping that comes with my first period. I have found the heat really helps, I don’t know why it just does and I’d recommend using some sort of heating pad or hot water bottle to anyone as it does seem to help and make you feel better.
Snacks/ Comfort food.
This is something I didn’t even think of for the first 2 cycles but I soon realized I was sending Daddy bear out for the same sort of snacks. For the first few days of my first cycle, I really struggle to find the appetite to eat anything so when I fancy something thats what I eat no matter what it is. I know its not the healthiest way to eat but I really struggle with eating when my emotions are all over the place. So eating chocolate, crisps, snack bars, and fruit is better than eating nothing at all so I always make sure I have them on hand for when it hits to save Daddy bear having to go to the shop for me while taking care of everything else for our family.
So here it is, what to expect with your first period after a pregnancy loss. I hope this helped in some way and again please feel free to message me either here in the comments or privately on my Facebook or Instagram.