Mum guilt has been a big thing for me after I had Baby bear. I struggled to have a shower without feeling guilty for leaving him with Daddy Bear or outside in his swing. As he got older leaving him for short period of times got easier as long as I was in the same facility as him. It took me a long time to leave Baby bear with Daddy bear. It took me even longer to leave him with my mum or mother-in-law.
Baby bear is nearly 2 and this feeling of guilt when I go out without him hasn’t got any better. Recently, we got invited to our friends wedding. Baby bear was invited but we made the decision to leave him with his grandparents for the evening. I felt fine about it all day. Baby bear was really struggling with lack of sleep from travelling and his teeth. It made sense right? I was fine until it come to about half hour before we was due to leave and then it hit me. Mum guilt.
He would have so much fun with his nan, granddad, aunts and uncle, I knew this. I knew 5 minutes after we would leave he would be fine, but I still couldn’t shake the feeling of guilt. As I was getting ready he went to play in the garden unfazed by the fact mummy and daddy were going out and I relaxed aittle.
I was relaxed until it come to saying goodbye. Baby bear isn’t very good at saying ‘bye-bye’. He cries and begs for cuddles, it breaks my heart everytime. I hate seeing my Baby like that, so upset and distressed.
Once we had arrived at the wedding, my mum sent through a video of Baby bear playing with uncle. Smiling, laughing, completely settled it made me feel even better about leaving him. As the evening went on the feeling of guilt slowly went away the more updates I got from my mum.
Mum guilt does get easier to handle, so far it hasn’t got easier saying goodbye but knowing he is with people who love him as much as we do. Knowing he is in safe hands does make enjoying myself alittle easier. People tell me it will get easier saying bye and I really hope this is true as I hate feeling mum guilt.